I made a spectacular find in the comic store today.
I can’t pick my favourite
these are things i would write
Number #5 killed me
These sound like things I would write. I love books with quirky first-person narration.
I can’t decide which one’s my favorite omfg
The lamp just sat there, Like AN INANIMATE OBJECTAYSGDU OHHICFKDJ FDKC.
my favorite bad analogy isn’t on this list
so I feel compelled to share it with you
“McBride fell twelve stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.”
last week my brother and I were making this gingerbread kit that came with a few little pre-made sugar people
so we open up the wax paper, only to reveal this little beauty
being sick fucks and also gutterminded perverts we had to further corrupt it with icing
4 months ago on January 15, 2013 at 08:34pm with 2 notes
Remember the cartoon Madeline?
not tagged in correct order D:
In an old house in Bag End, all covered in vines, lived thirteen little dwarves in two straight lines.
They sang very well and their spirits were glad, but their mess made Bilbo very mad.
At Bilbo’s table they broke his bread and drank his ale and went to bed.
They left the house at half past nine to travel far and fight some dragons- the smallest one was Bilbo Baggins.
Gentle reminder that while the dwarves have loyalty, honor, willing hearts, and all the
manlydwarfly smolder you can shake a stick at, they are collectively about as dumb as a box of bricks.
#when bilbo baggins is the brains of your operation #your operation is fucked #this goes for you too thorin #yeah you caught on faster than kili #but that’s like saying you caught on faster than a concussed duck
literally crying at those tags omfg
‘that’s like saying you caught on faster than a concussed duck’
i don’t know why but this makes me want a dwarf frat boy au like i’ve never wanted anything
like fili and kili are the really adorable freshmen everybody’s vaguely worried about
and thorin is obsessed with the honour of the fraternity
and gandalf is a grad student who looks 27 or something but is actually like 45 and working on his 6th PhD and supporting himself through tutoring, growing weed, and making amateur fireworks which usually don’t blow up in people’s faces
and bofur is the only one who knows how to cook
and ori once stabbed a guy with a knitting needle during an attempted mugging
aaaaand i dk they basically kidnap bilbo who’s like an anthropology major who never has anything to do with the frats and is a hard-core member of a co-op or something
and go on a quest to win back their like engraved gold shot glass collection that was stolen by a rival frat when thorin’s grandfather was at the college
(if somebody has already written this please direct me to it asap)
You have no idea how badly I suddenly want this,
my face when suddenly a hobbit college AU seems like not a bad idea???
please tell me that i’m not the only one who did a double take at
What keeps you awake at night?
before they mentally adjusted the syntax
So I’m at this pizza place and all there is in the bathroom is a framed picture of Willy wonka
you’ll be in a world of pure urination